The Bitch is Back and She’s Drinking Heavily

The British Association for Anger Management has released a statement of concern regarding the trend of aggressive and ‘out-of-control’ young women, and claims that binge drinking is at least partly to blame. The girls we are dealing with in schools are increasingly physically aggressive.They are tired of being pushed around by boys and they are … Continued

David Cassidy Blames Wandering Eye

There’s been further developments on the David Cassidy DUI front. Mr. Cassidy allegedly failed two roadside drunk tests, appeared to be unable to stand upright during the tests, and was “swaying while standing” according to the arresting officers. Mr. Cassidy now claims this problem was a result of eye-problems he has had since childhood. Also, … Continued

Drinking To Forget You Baby: Man Can’t Remember Driving

Kane Hitchman, a 22 year old resident of Fielding New Zealand, was recently convicted of driving under the influence after police found him and his car in a ditch after a night of  heavy drinking. The man didn’t remember getting in his car and driving home, but he did recall drinking at least 8 bourbons … Continued

Woodford Reserve Maple Wood Finish

The Philadelphia Enquirer has a little write-up on the latest edition in the Woodford Reserve Master Collection, Maple Wood Finish. The writer describes the bourbon as “one of the most delicious whiskeys I’ve ever sipped”. At this point I’m going out on a limb and saying it’s one of the most delicious whiskeys I’ve never … Continued

Willie Nelson Arrested by an Asshole from El Paso

Willie Nelson has been arrested in the state of Texas on marijuana possession charges. Law enforcement officials found six ounces of marijuana on Nelson’s tour bus at an El Paso checkpoint. Mr. Nelson admitted the marijuana was his. He  was held briefly and then released on bail of $2500.00. Nelson has been busted before. In … Continued

Night Swimming: Mounties Get Their Man

Kelowna RCMP reported an intoxicated man jumping into the icy waters of Kelowna Lake in an attempt to avoid arrest last night. The man was fleeing an incident of assault of a bouncer at a Kelowna nightclub when he jumped into the lake, despite the -8 C temperature at the time. Two companions opted for … Continued

Bush Charged with Drunk Driving

No, not that Bush, Jacqueline Bush of Clarksville Tennessee. The mother of two children aged five and 11-months was pulled over smelling of alcohol and slurring her speech, according to reports. The children were in the car with her at the time of her arrest. You know, if you’re gonna drink and drive, i suggest … Continued

The Bourbon Genre

The Bourbon Genre. What exactly is it anyway? Is it a bird, flying badly with an injured wing, but looking good doing it? Is it a plane, streaking through the night sky, destination unknown? Here at the meaning of the term has been a matter of philosophical debate, metaphysical wrangling, verbal hijinks, and, at … Continued

Dead Flowers

The random gods spun up Townes Van Zandt singing Dead Flowers tonight. The original Stones version appeared on the Julep Sessions Vol. I. I remember that I printed copies of the lyrics and brought them to the inaugural  Kentucky Derby party. At some point during the party I found myself drunk as hell in … Continued